Oh dear. It’s only January 4, the weather is still quite lovely (though I’d sure like to see the sun for a change), and yet I’m getting hit with a serious case of the January blahs. It’s been hard getting back to work after a nice holiday. My energy is sapped, I can hardly drag my body out of bed in the morning, I feel unmotivated and uninspired, and I’ve succumbed to the temptation of the “wishes”.
I wish I had a winter holiday to look forward to. Somewhere warm and sunny.
I wish Christmas vacation weren’t over and I could be at home with my kids.
I wish I could quit my job and be a stay-at-home mom.
I wish I could make a decent living as a freelance writer. Or consultant.
I wish I could motivate myself to exercise so I’d have more energy.
I wish I could stay in bed in the morning instead of responding to the alarm.
I wish I didn’t have to be a slave to the pay cheque.
I wish I didn’t eat so much when I’m feeling blue.
I wish I felt more inspired.
I wish something exciting would happen so I’d feel invigorated for awhile.
I wish the sun would come out.
Oh well. It’s no use wishing. This is my life, this is what I’ve got for now and not much is going to change in the near future. Just gotta suck it up and make the best of it. I suppose there ARE some things I could change – like eating less and exercising more – but I’m too busy wallowing in self pity to try.
Yeah, yeah, I know I should count my blessings, it could be worse, “always look on the bright side”, blah, blah, blah. Spare me the platitudes – I just wanna wallow for awhile. I’ll be better soon… like maybe March.