What I’ve been thinking about lately

This body, without the triumphant narrative

I am fat. Let’s get that out of the way first. At least 60-70 pounds over what would be considered my “ideal weight”. Probably more, but I don’t own a scale.  I don’t love this about myself, but it’s part of my story. It has been, to varying degrees, all of my adult...

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Hold your tongue and offer your heart instead

When my mom was dying of cancer, I occasionally got messages from well-meaning people who wanted to offer what they thought was valuable information about how mom could cure her cancer. Eat raw food, take more vitamin C, stop drinking milk - all of those suggestions...

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Forgiveness and the death of my son

If it hadn’t been for doctors’ errors, I would have a sixteen-year-old son. Halfway through my third pregnancy, I could sense that something was wrong. My body didn’t feel right. “I feel like I have to re-adjust my hips every time I stand up to avoid the baby dropping...

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Centring marginalized voices and decolonizing my bookshelf

At the beginning of 2016, I made a commitment to read only books by authors who weren’t from the dominant culture. My intent was to broaden my education and stretch myself by staying away from books written by white able-bodied cisgender heterosexuals. Books have...

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How to start a women’s circle

Tonight is my weekly women’s circle, and I’m looking forward to it as I always do. It’s not a perfect space (we are all human and we don’t always know how to hold space for each other), but it is beautifully imperfect. We show up - sometimes 2 women and sometimes 12 -...

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Learning to listen

  My three daughters are all very different in how they view the world, how they communicate and how they process emotions. One of the most challenging things I’ve had to learn as their mom is that I have to listen to them differently. One is introverted and...

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