I had high hopes for this week. I took some time off work, and was dreaming of a magical week with lots of creativity and growing-of-new-things. But I may have overestimated the potential of a week off.
I haven’t lost all hope, but… I’ve just discovered that I’m more burnt out than I realized. Yesterday was mostly a productive day (painting bold colours in Julie’s room), but then I had to deal with a work issue (final approval for a video project), and suddenly I fell apart. The moment I had to go on my work email, my mood took a nosedive and I spent the rest of the day and evening trying to hide from my family the fact that I was fighting tears. (They thought I was spending an inordinate amount of time painting behind the door so they couldn’t come in.)
I knew I was a little burnt out, but I thought I could just bury it and keep on coping. Maybe not.
So for the rest of this week, I’m not going to put much pressure on myself to finish the projects I was planning to work on (sigh). I’m just going to focus on making sure I don’t fall apart all together.
On top of that, I just found out that a woman who lived across the street, whose 2 daughters were friends of Julie and Maddie, died on the weekend. I’m feeling heartsick.