Today is another in a long series of grey, sometimes drizzly, sometimes windy days. This morning I feel like a caged animal, longing for the space beyond the clouds, beyond the grey.
I feel easily caged. It’s part of my nature. Put too many boundaries around me (office walls, too much structure, not enough time on my schedule to wander, too many rules or limitations), and I get so restless I could SCREAM. I pace the cage, I rail against the machine, I get really, really cranky.
I know this about myself, and yet I keep expecting something different. I keep thinking I should WANT to fit into the cages that seem to make other people happy, I should LIKE sitting still for awhile, I should be THANKFUL for the office walls and structures that box me in. Oh the “shoulds” I have dumped on my head! I’ve tried so hard to fit into the ordered worlds that seem to make other people happy. And yet I can’t. It just doesn’t work for me.
It’s the same way in the world of business. Even though I am thrilled that self-employment gives me more opportunity to wander, to sit in the middle of a labyrinth to do my work, or to choose the library, a coffee shop, or my tiny basement studio as my creative space for the day, I still find myself trying to force myself into some kind of box.
I should be able to fit my business into a box, shouldn’t I? All the business books tell us to be specific, to have a crisp clean elevator speech, to have a niche market, to KNOW what we offer the world and to be able to communicate it in simple clean language.
But every time I try one of those boxes, I start to get really, really restless and I want to bust out of the box. Every time I try to define myself as one thing – “writer, communications consultant, teacher, creative midwife, facilitator, leadership coach, transformation guide” – I start going a little crazy and my body fills with angst.
And then I do that thing I do when I assume everyone else is figuring it out except for me – I assume there must be something wrong with me. I beat myself up a bit, and I try a little harder to fit into a box.
But the boxes NEVER FIT!
Because I am a wanderer. An explorer. A scanner (in the words of Barbara Sher).
I am a creative thinker. A box-buster. A questioner. An outside-the-lines-colourer.
And you know what? I’m proud of that and I don’t want to beat myself up over it any more. I want to BE WHO I AM and build a business out of that instead of trying to find some model that doesn’t fit.
Because of that, two things will be happening in the coming weeks:
1.) Next week (on my birthday), I will be releasing a new product that I absolutely LOVE because it is so true to my heart. It is about the beauty of being a wanderer and I’m SO happy that other wanderers have agreed to help me with it. OH MY GOSH this is going to be fun! I’m celebrating what makes me a wanderer, sharing it with you, and hopefully helping you to celebrate your own box-busting, colouring-outside-the-lines, happy wanderer nature too.
2.) Within a month or so, I plan to migrate my blog over to my heatherplett.com url. I have loved Sophia Leadership, but it has begun to feel like another one of those boxes. Not nearly everything I want to write about or create or sell is about feminine wisdom or about leadership. It’s time to just brand MYSELF and release the products and services that emerge out of my gifts instead of trying to squeeze all of my energy and creativity into a brand that doesn’t fit. I’ll still write about leadership and feminine wisdom now and then, but that won’t be the whole she-bang. Being a WANDERER is part of my brand, and so I will celebrate my burning need to wander from one idea to the next.
I’d love to hear from you if you have any ideas. For example, let me know what your favourite things are about visiting my site. What would you like to see more of? What things would you buy from me if I created them? What e-courses would you like to see me teach?
Hi Heather
I discovered your Sophia Leadership site a little while ago (a week or two). Not sure how, but I think through a facebook link. Your writing really resonates with me. On reading your post, I realise that I aa happy wanderer too. Or rather a wanderer, who is happy when she is allowed to wander! I hate any kind of restriction, and here I’m particularly thinking of a 9 to 5 job spent in the same place every day. No, NOT good!
I have just started my own blog (brand spanking shiny new – only a month old) called the Turquoise Room. I’m still getting into the groove and I need to work lots on my pages still, but its happening! The main and most important reason for doing it, is for me to express me – and if it resonates with, and is helpful to, others – well brilliant (although I can’t help checking my stats v v regularly!) Have a look is you would like… theturquoiseroom.wordpress.com
Looking forward to enjoying lots more of your blog/web-site whatever form it takes!
Warmest wishes
Jen
Jen! Thanks so much for visiting! I’ve just visited your site (and will be leaving a comment there shortly) and think you’re doing some cool things! I wish you all kinds of luck in the journey you’re on.
Welcome to the happy wanderers club!!
Love this post! I am a wanderer/scanner/explorer as well. Looking forward to your new product & watching you expand into brand Heather. 🙂
Nancee – welcome to the happy wanderers club! I can’t wait to share my new offering. I think it will be as much fun for people who buy it as it’s been for me to create it!
Heather, thank you for this post. As a “box-breaker” as well, so many things you write resonate with me and your resolve to “BE WHO I AM and build a business out of that instead of trying to find some model that doesn’t fit” is the only way to be truly authentic in your business and life.
I have a theory that restlessness is what drives us to dig deeper into who we are and spread our wings wider.
I am SO there with you! I mentioned in my intro on the Playing Big course that sometimes I feel like an octopus, and that every box I try to climb into leaves some of my limbs out… and then, this week I found a book on the creative process in which the artist drew herself and her creations as a cephalopod that wouldn’t fit in the box! Yet I keep trying to find some box, somewhere. I don’t think that there is an octopus-shaped box out there, somehow. And I don’t think I should be trying to build one. Something else, less like a box. More conducive to octopuses.
Hi Heather – I’ve been reading your blog on and off for a few months but this is my first comment. You know what I love about you? You’re very real, and of course, a great writer. My hunch is that when you brand yourself and create from that place of uniquely YOU, it will all be good.