This morning, I had the sudden urge to watch the sun rise over Matthew’s grave. I’d been working on the re-write of my book and was thinking about him in the early hours of the morning. And so, before anyone else was awake, I headed to the graveyard.
Something caught my eye when I got there. A statue of a woman, only about 50 feet from Matthew’s grave. Though she stands about 15 feet high, I’d never really noticed her before.
I carried my camera across the snow and took a few pictures of her. I wasn’t sure who she was. Mary was my first thought, but then I puzzled over why she was holding a book and standing in front of a globe and a stack of books.
It wasn’t until I started walking away that I had a sudden realization… she’s holding a BOOK! I came here (like I’ve done many times) for guidance about a book. She’s holding MY book! Only, what came out of my mouth was…
“She’s holding MY FUCKING BOOK!” (Yes, I swore. It was one of those moments.)
What I wrote in my journal was: “Sophia God is holding my book. I guess I’d better trust her with it then.” And with that thought came a huge sense of release and comfort.
I don’t have to worry about my book, or about how I’ll get it published or whether people will want to buy it. It’s in God’s hands. All I have to do is show up and finish it.
I don’t know what the statue is meant to represent to other people who visit the grave, but I know what she means to me. And I can’t help but be amused at the way she remained hidden from me all these years, until now, when I’m standing on the precipice of finishing my book and getting it into print (my hope for 2012).
Sophia God has a sense of humour. And a lovely way of bringing surprise and wonder into our lives.
UPDATE: After I wrote this post, I opened my daily email from Fr. Richard Rohr. At first I skimmed it, thought it didn’t interest me, and ignored it. But then I opened another email from a friend who’d quoted Rohr’s email, so I re-opened it. Wouldn’t you know it… December 17th is the day associated with Sophia, feminine wisdom. Don’t you love synchronicity?
Today, December 17, (according to the Antiphons) begins with the letter S for sapientia. Wisdom—sophia in Greek, sapientia in Latin, sabiduria in Spanish—was the feminine metaphor for the Eternal Divine, as found especially in the books of Proverbs and Wisdom. One might partner or compare Sophia with Logos, which is the masculine metaphor for the Divine. It is interesting that Logos was used in John’s Gospel (1:9-14) and became the preferred tradition, but Sophia was seldom used outside of the monasteries. On December 17 we invoke the feminine image of God as Holy Wisdom. – Richard Rohr
this is wonderful ~ funny when we follow the nudges.
I noticed that the moon is captured in the top photo. the moon is often associated with Archangel Gabriel, whom is known as the messenger angel. She is a strong and powerful archangel, helping artists,writers,teachers and those that do anything delivering spiritual messages.
I am sorry that you visit your son in a graveyard. I am grateful that you use your love and courage to help others.
Jo – thank you so much for adding another layer of richness to my experience! I intentionally captured the moon in that picture, but hadn’t thought of the association with Archangel Gabriel. Lovely!
This is one of the most beautiful things I’ve read, Heather. Yes, because you wrote it; but more, because it is achingly, powerfully, beautifully, whimsically true.
Yes…rest, trust, and know. All you (and all of us) have to do is show up. Sophia’s got it (and all of us) covered.
Thank you!
Thanks Ronna! I’m so glad it resonated with you. 🙂 Let’s write these books, shall we? The world’s bookshelves need a little more feminine wisdom and spirituality!
So interesting ~ the string of coincidences today that brought me to your blog.
This morning a friend of mine, a nun, posted something about the O antiphons. Although I’m immersed in the traditions of Christmas, for some reason I hadn’t learned about the Antiphons. I did a little reading and learned about today’s date: December 17, and the significance of the name Sophia – and Holy Wisdom. This is the day!
Also online at the same time I noticed that my friend Dave mentioned that his son Matthew was coming home from college today. I thought it odd that he call him Matthew, since he’s usually Matt, but I thought about how good it must be to have him come home. Their other son Adam died tragically at age 16.
Shortly after that I saw that my nephew Ben and his wife had posted that they were at the hospital about to have a baby, whom they’ve only called “Baby D” since the day they were pregnant. I wrote on their page that today was a wonderful day to have a baby – December 17 being the day of the year that we woo the feminine Divine – Sophia – Holy Wisdom.
So imagine my surprise then that the next time he posted was to announce the birth of their daughter: SOPHIA!
Ben and Ashley have no spiritual life that I know of, but I can’t help but think there was a special connection made today. I googled Sophia and Wisdom so I could learn more for them and I came to your site.
I have no idea what this is all about – but I know it’s important.
Oh Gretchen! I’m so moved by your comment! What a lot of beautiful synchronicities showing up for you AND me today!
It sure sounds like you’re getting some pretty significant whispers to write your book too. 🙂
thank you. . .
I love these moments of dreaming awake! When art and spirituality run on the same tracks synchronicity happens. Our only job then is to allow the metaphor to sink in. Someone else may have taken this as irony, but it is sheer synchronicity. God is alive when we can read our own books. I love this post. Thanks so much for sharing it!
Wonderful. Thank you for sharing your heart.
Beautiful post. I love how attuned you are to the synchronicities in your life!