by Heather Plett | Sep 5, 2013 | mandala
I saw the wisdom in her eyes. She’d lived nearly 70 years on this earth and had walked with grace through a lot of pain and growth and self-discovery. As her coach, I wasn’t sure what I could offer her. I often wonder that when I see the wisdom in the eyes of my clients, and yet I show up and ask the questions, and somehow they always end up taking a step even deeper into their True Selves. It’s a beautiful thing to serve as witness, storycatcher, and guide.
She had just shared the story of a middle-of-the-night breakthrough in which she’d realized that she was still carrying a burden of anger with her. She was seeking clarity about what the anger was about. Was she still angry at her husband who’d died a few years earlier? God? Herself? She wasn’t sure.
At the end of the session, in which her own storytelling helped her find some of the clarity she was seeking, she looked over at the mandala journals beside me. “What are those?” she asked. “These are my mandala journals,” I said. “When clients are interested, I offer them some mandala-journaling processes that help them work through some of the questions sitting on their hearts.”
Her eyes lit up. “Tell me about them.” And so I did. I found the ones that I thought might help her peel back the layers of the question she was sitting with, and walked her through the simple instructions. “Sometimes,” I said, “when we’re stuck inside something so deep that we don’t have words to help us unpack it, a mandala can help us find a path through.”
“When we simply use words in our journals, we can get stuck in left-brain thinking. We try to use logic and reason to work our way through our questions. The deeper soul questions don’t respond well to logic and reason. They need to be invited into a different space – a deeper space in the heart where intuition, creativity, and spirituality rest.”
“A mandala is such a space. In invites you deeper into your intuitive heart. It serves as an invitation for those questions so deep and shapeless you don’t have words to define them.”
When I looked at her again, I saw something new in her eyes – softening, understanding, and gratitude. Something had shifted. Something in her heart had opened up. “Thank you,” she said softly. “Thank you for giving me this tool. I think you’ve just gifted me with exactly what I need.”
A week later, a mutual acquaintance emailed me to say she’d seen my client in the neighbourhood. “She looked lighter than I’ve seen her look in years. Something has been lifted off of her shoulders.”
I didn’t take that woman’s weight off her shoulders. She found the path through her own anger to a place of lightness. I simply asked the questions and gave her some tools to help her on the journey.
That look in her eyes, however, served as a catalyst for me. (It’s almost always the case that I gain as much from my coaching clients as they gain from me.) I’d almost forgotten the value of mandala journaling, until she reminded me what a powerful tool it can be. I’d let it slip in my priorities, under the other work I was doing, but suddenly I knew that I had to bring it back into my primary work. I needed to make it available to other people seeking paths through their pain, anger, inertia, grief, fear, stuckness, growth, etc.
I dove back into it, and before long, I’d created the foundation for Mandala Discovery: 30 Days of Mandala Journaling.
If you’re looking for a new tool that will help you entertain the questions in your heart, perhaps Mandala Journaling is for you.
This is not about art-making or technique (there are lots of other art journaling courses out there for that purpose). It’s about providing you with a simple tool for deeper self-discovery.
For only $45, you’ll get an introductory booklet about mandalas, a pdf that lists what kind of tools you might want to have on hand, one mandala journaling prompt every day for 30 days, and access to a private Facebook group where you can share your mandala journaling questions and insights.
Your soul questions are calling you. Why don’t you create a space where they can feel safe?
by Heather Plett | Sep 3, 2013 | Uncategorized
Less than a week ago, I asked for my readers’ help in achieving my dream of a trip to two events that I want to participate in. Yesterday I booked my flights. I’m going because many generous people made it possible. A combination of gifts and new business has helped me raise enough money for the trip.
It’s been a humbling experience to be the recipient of so much generosity and positive response to the work that I do. Here are some of the things I learned:
1. People want to help and they want to be asked. This is something I have to be reminded of again and again when I get stuck in my self-sufficient patterns. We are wired for living in community. We want to be of service to each other. It gives us a sense of value and belonging when we are able to help other people. It can’t be a one-way street, though – if you don’t give other people opportunities to serve you, you can’t live effectively in community.
2. It is possible to live in a gift economy. I have been intentional about including elements of the gift economy into my business – I give coaching sessions and workshop registration to up-and-coming leaders, and I’ve traded coaching sessions for editing services and other offerings because I believe that it’s time for us to stop relying so heavily on a financial economy that – when it runs rampant – contributes to a lot of greed, injustice and destructiveness. I also believe that entering into this different way of being in the world of business has opened the door for me to receive gifts from others to help me grow my work. It’s not based on direct exchange the way the financial economy is (the people I give to aren’t necessarily the ones who give to me), but when we give good things out into the world, it comes back to us in surprising ways. We CAN change the system! (For more on the gift economy, I highly recommend Sacred Economics by Charles Eisenstein.)
3. It takes courage and vulnerability to ask for help. I had to think long and hard before I hit send on that request, and even after I sent it, I had moments of fear and trepidation. My pride and shame got in the way. “What if people think less of me? What if people think I’m not very successful at business if I can’t afford this trip? What if they write me off as a charity case rather than a serious writer/coach/facilitator?” All of those things went through my head, but then when I sent it, I got a LOT of emails from people saying “I am so inspired by the courage it took you to ask.” or “Thank you for your vulnerability – you have inspired me.”
4. People are surprised when we dare to step out of what the capitalist system teaches us about “every man for himself”. Though all of the emails I received were kind, some were quite surprised by my “audacity” and said they’d never have the courage to do it. To be frank, this makes me a little sad – that we have become so self-sufficient in our culture that it is surprising when people step out of that pattern and admit they could use help. How can we move back into the kind of community living where there is no shame in getting help from your neighbours?
5. There is a difference between asking for support in growing your work or asking for support to pay the bills. I think one of the things that made this easier for me to do was the fact that I wasn’t asking for money to buy groceries to feed my children. I do believe that people would still have responded to that kind of request, but it would have been much harder for me to ask because of the shame it would bring up in me. That’s something I still need to process further.
6. There are good people everywhere. Sometimes we get stuck in flawed belief systems that tell us most people are more interested in our destruction than our success. That is simply not true. There are many, many good people in the world, and, though there are some whose own broken stories cause them to do damage to other people (my husband works with some of those in prison), most of us want to serve the cause of good. I was quite surprised by the range of people who reached out to help – people who’ve known me for most of my life, people who’ve only read my blog a few times and feel connected to me through my words, people who’ve been participants in my courses and workshops, and people I’ve met at conferences or other places. I tried to find a pattern to who was giving (e.g. mostly people I’ve met in person, or mostly people who’ve received my services at some point), but there really was no pattern. There are good people everywhere and I feel deeply blessed to have encountered so many!!
by Heather Plett | Aug 28, 2013 | Uncategorized
I’m doing something rather unusual today… I’m asking for help.
I have a couple of amazing opportunities coming up in the next two months, but I could use your help to get there. Here’s where I hope to go:
- Gather the Women Global Matrix annual gathering in Lake Tahoe, California (September 22-25). Last year I co-hosted this beautiful circle of women in Peterborough, Ontario and became a committed member of the global community. Their goal is simple and clear – spread women’s circles around the world. While I was there last year, I found out that my mom’s cancer was back and there was no longer anything the doctors could do. At the end of the gathering I said to the women “by the time we meet again, I may not have a living mom.” That beautiful circle women wrapped their arms around me and have been supporting me ever since. THIS is the power of circles.
- Patti Digh’s Design Your Life Camp (October 3-6). When I first heard about what Patti Digh was putting together, I was captivated. “Wow,” I thought. “Just the kind of people I’d like to go to camp with.” On a whim, on the very last day that they were accepting submissions, I sent in a proposal to offer one of the Spark Sessions on “The courage to lead differently”. I didn’t think much more about it… until the lineup was announced and mine had been selected!
These both feel like incredible opportunities to a.) be supported by people doing similar work in the world, and b.) expand the reach of my own work.
The problem is… I don’t have the financial resources to pay for all of the travel involved. (Back to school season is expensive when you have three daughters.) My registration is covered at both events, and the accommodations are already paid for the first event, but I need to pay for the plane tickets, accommodations at the second event, and (possibly) accommodations in between.
I have been wracking my brain trying to think of ways to come up with the money. In the end, this thought kept coming back to me… “Why don’t you ask your readers to support you?”
Gulp. For someone who’s been raised with a healthy dose of self-sufficiency and has a lot of trouble swallowing her pride to ask for help, that question took a lot to digest. And yet, it kept coming back to me.
What I realized is this… Those of you who show up faithfully at this page, those who leave comments and send beautiful emails to let me know what my words mean to you – all of you WANT to see this work spread further into the world, or you wouldn’t show up as open-heartedly and generously as you do.
And then this thought kept coming to me… “If I want to live in a gift economy, I need to give people more opportunities to offer gifts to me so that I can spread my own gifts further.” Since many of you have already received some version of gift from me (in the form of blog posts, coaching sessions, free ebooks, etc.) I want to now offer you an opportunity to live in the gift economy with me.
There are three ways that you can help support my trip to Lake Tahoe and Atlanta:
- Purchase something that I sell – namely a coaching session, registration in Lead with Your Wild Heart, registration in Creative Writing for Self-Discovery (local to Winnipeg), or registration in the yet-to-be-announced Mandala Discovery: 30 Days of Mandala Journaling.
- Help me find a way and place to generate some income in the week between Lake Tahoe and Atlanta – somewhere in transit between those two places. Perhaps a workshop could be offered for an organization or community group, in-person coaching sessions could be made available for staff or community members, or consulting work could be done? I’m open to creative suggestions.
- Offer a financial gift, free of any attachments, with the understanding that your gift will help me to spread my gifts into the world, and the gift economy will spread. Here’s a handy donate button if you want to give by Paypal, or email to offer other possibilities.
From the bottom of my heart, I thank you for being part of my community. Whether or not you are able to support this dream of mine, please know that you are valued and appreciated and I wouldn’t be here doing this work if it wasn’t for you.
Note: I need between $1500 and $2000, depending on flight costs and whether or not I need to pay for accommodations in between events. If, perchance, I should receive more than that in gifts, you can be sure that the additional funds would be put to good use in growing my work. For example, I am beginning to feel a real need for a space (office/studio/classroom) where I can do coaching sessions and offer workshops.
by Heather Plett | Aug 26, 2013 | Beauty, calling, Intuition, journey, Labyrinth
When you stand at the very centre of the Carol Shield’s labyrinth, as I did yesterday evening, and speak out to the edges, you will hear your own voice echoed ever so slightly back to you. You have to listen very carefully to hear it and you have to be standing in exactly the right spot or the echo evades you.
In labyrinthian journeys, the centre is known as the place where you open yourself to receiving from Spirit, after walking in and releasing what was previously getting in the way.
Which begs the question… what am I meant to receive from the echo of my own voice? What wisdom is already hidden in me that I might not yet be aware of?
Yesterday in church the pastor spoke about giftedness – how we need only be faithful with our gifts in order for them to multiply. At the centre of the labyrinth, I thought about that in relation to my voice. It’s a gift that already exists, coming out of a wisdom that God has already planted within me, and I don’t need to keep looking elsewhere for my source of inspiration.
Faithfulness to our gifts means that we must exercise them, train them, and grow them. Practice and study are both very important, but what’s also important is a deep level of trust in the gift itself.
In our eagerness to perfect the gift, and our insecurity about using it before it is sufficiently polished, we forget about the ancient wisdom already there. We forget that the unpolished gift already has beauty.
When I was a child, I had a growing realization that I had a unique ability to see things – to really see them in a deeper way than most people did. When I would try to explain things that I’d seen to other people, I knew by their lack of understanding that they’d never witnessed them in the same way that I did.
These were fairly ordinary things, but for me they had an aura of magic. For example, I was always captivated by the image of deer leaping over fences. That sight would freeze me in my tracks and I was stand in awe at the magic I had just witnessed. When I would try to explain how that sight impacted me, people would usually look at me with a puzzled look and I knew that they’d only ever seen deer leaping over fences as ordinary and not transcendent.
I stopped talking about things that seemed mystical to me. It made me feel too much like an oddball. Now, years later, I recognize that ability to see things as a part of the ancient wisdom buried in me. I am a meaning-maker, a storycatcher, a seer… perhaps even a mystic. I see metaphor and meaning in things that pass many people by. I receive messages from deer or trees or sunsets and I walk away changed. It’s still not always easy to talk about (as I mentioned in my last post), but I am growing in my ability to trust it.
In The Naked Now: Learning to See as the Mystics See, Richard Rohr talks about the three ways to see a sunset…
One man saw the immense physical beauty and enjoyed the event in itself. This man was the “sensate” type who, like 80 percent of the world, deals with what he can see, feel, touch, move, and fix. This was enough reality for him, for he had little interest in larger ideas, intuitions, or the grand scheme of things. He saw with his first eye, which was good.
A second man saw the sunset. He enjoyed all the beauty that the first man did. Like all lovers of coherent thought, technology, and science, he also enjoyed his power to make sense of the universe and explain what he discovered. He thought about the cyclical rotations of planets and stars. Through imagination, intuition, and reason, he saw with his second eye, which was even better.
The third man saw the sunset, knowing and enjoying all that the first and the second men did. But in his ability to progress from seeing to explaining to “tasting,” he also remained in awe before an underlying mystery, coherence, and spaciousness that connected him with everything else. He used his third eye, which is the full goal of all seeing and all knowing. This was the best.
The third man, who sees with his third eye, is a mystic. As soon as I read Rohr’s description of what it means to be a mystic, I knew that this had something to do with the way that I’d always seen the world. The seeds of mysticism were already there when I stood in awe of deer leaping over fences.
I have read a thousand books, taken a thousand classes, and yet none of them can teach me to access the ancient wisdom – the wisdom of the seer – that is already within me. None of them can point to the gift that is meant for me to share. For that I must quiet all of the external voices, remove myself from the noise of my life and walk a labyrinth or wander the woods. That is when my own voice is echoed back at me and I know that I already have what I need.
What is the ancient wisdom buried in you? It may be body wisdom, heart wisdom, or head wisdom. It may be the ability to see justice, create order, experience beauty, shape stories, make people laugh, or offer compassion. What did you already know as a child, but might have been afraid to speak of or do or be because it made you seem like an oddball? What do you now need to do to create space for that wisdom to emerge?
To start with, find a quiet place where your wisdom can echo back to you through the silence. Walk away from the noise of other people’s voices and expectations and stand in silence with your God. In that quiet place, let your gift emerge from its hiding place, let it fill your heart with knowing, and give yourself permission to trust it. Then, by all means, practice, train, and polish it, but don’t forget to use it in the meantime. It already has value.
The gift is yours – be faithful in using it and it will multiply.
by Heather Plett | Aug 21, 2013 | Community, Spirituality, Uncategorized
I am spiritual. That’s no surprise to you if you’ve been reading this blog for any period of time.
But it might be a surprise to you that I haven’t always been comfortable being “out” about my spirituality.
For starters, I was raised in a fairly conservative evangelical Mennonite family where faith was fairly black and white and you didn’t walk labyrinths, make prayer flags, take Buddhist meditation classes, pray to the Divine Feminine, embrace other faith perspectives, or talk about the way God speaks through a deer or a tree.
When I started exploring those things, I was afraid of rejection, and so I kept most of my exploration secret. There was a little too much fear of going to hell if you “worshipped false gods” in those circles, and that fear lingered deep in my own psyche long after I thought I’d dealt with it. I still don’t talk about it very much in some circles, and to be honest, I’m still excavating some of my rejection and fear stories around that. (I still consider myself a Christ-follower, by the way, but my understanding of what that means has shifted dramatically.)
For another thing, I spent a lot of years in the corporate world where any talk of spirituality was strictly taboo. Though I sometimes thought that my staff or the management teams I was on might be better off if we brought mindfulness and more spiritual openness into what we did, I wasn’t confident enough in my own exploration yet to introduce it. Again, it was mostly fear of rejection that kept me silent.
When I quit my job and started my own business, I started out as a split personality, still trying to keep my spirituality mostly in the closet. I had two websites – one was the polished, corporate-looking one I showed potential clients and students in my university classes, and the other was the blog where I explored the things that mattered most to me, including spirituality. Every time someone from the corporate/university world found the blog, I cringed a little, worried that they would no longer take me seriously as a consultant or teacher. There is, after all, an assumption in our culture that being spiritual means that you’re less intellectual and probably a little weaker than others.
About a year and a half ago, I started to realize that maintaining these two public faces was creating angst for me and making me feel disingenuous. After a couple of failed consulting gigs, I realized that I really didn’t want to work with clients who wouldn’t be comfortable with my spirituality. After trying to be something in the classroom I really wasn’t, I realized that my best teaching happened when I was authentically me.
And so I came out. I combined my blog with my website, integrated my spirituality into my consulting/facilitation/teaching work, and got used to stepping into a classroom where students and administration might think me a little “flakey or too woo-woo”.
I can’t tell you that it magically brought me all of the “right” kinds of clients (it’s still a gradual process), but I can tell you that things started to shift. In the very first class I taught after deciding to be more open and sharing my blog with students, I had four students approach me individually, interested in coming to me for coaching because they were looking for something deeper than they could receive in a classroom. And I started to get invitations to do amazing work that fits me perfectly, like the week long artists’ retreat I facilitated last week in Saskatchewan.
Yes, my work has shifted, and I’m sure a few corporate clients have been turned away by language that feels uncomfortable for them, but that’s okay.
More and more, my work is a true expression of who I am, not just the skills I can offer. More and more, I am bringing the full basket of my gifts and wisdom into what I offer.
And the right people are showing up. Almost all of my coaching clients, for example, share stories of how they too are trying to live more authentically and more boldly in a world that expects them to be more “corporate, straight, conventional, unemotional, etc.” They show up with their own fear of rejection stories and I can truly say “I see you.” And in the last six months, I’ve had the opportunity to host half a dozen retreat/workshops that are all about connecting on a deeper, more spiritual way. Again, I am more prepared to host them because I have been on my own journey to this deeper, more authentic place.
Another interesting thing has happened. Some of the people whose rejection I feared are coming forward and saying “Your work resonates with me. I’m curious about labyrinths/mandalas/etc. Can you tell me more?” My own “coming out” is encouraging others to be more honest about their own questions and exploration.
What about you? Do you sometimes feel like a fraud because you’re hiding the titles of the books you read from your colleagues at work? Do you take meditation classes in secret because you don’t want your family to know? Do you furtively read blog posts that make your heart sing, but you’re quite sure nobody in your world would understand? Do you feel like one of my clients, who said she is “kind of a weirdo, but in a good way”? Have you despaired of finding a circle of people like you who have questions that most people think are too “out there”?
You will need to find your own path through this, but you don’t have to do it alone. There are more of us spiritual seekers out here in this big world than you might imagine. Trust me – when I started being more open about my quest, I started connecting with a lot of amazing people who, like me, want to dive into meaningful conversations that go far beyond small talk, straight to the heart.
Here are a few thoughts on how you can begin to move into a more integrated, authentic life:
- Start small. Find at least one person who feels like a safe space to talk about your quest. This might be someone you already know and trust, someone at a yoga class, or a coach like me. Before you start the conversation, though, be sure that the person you’re talking to can respond in a non-judgemental way. If you face judgement in your very first conversation, your authentic you will run further into hiding.
- Find a place where you can be true to yourself. This might be your journal, a secret place in the woods, your favourite coffee shop or bookstore, or your art studio. In that space, commit to being totally honest with yourself about who you are and what you seek in the world. Read the books you want to read, write the truth that longs to be said, and dare to stand in awe of an eagle that seems to have a message just for you.
- Find a practice that connects you with your spiritual Self. There are many options – yoga, dance, meditation, walking, running, painting, mandala-making, etc. Do something that brings you peace and leaves you feeling connected to that authentic part of you that’s been buried under other people’s expectations.
- Practice truthfulness one tiny step at a time. If you are feeling inauthentic at work, find a least one co-worker whom you trust who won’t laugh at you when you admit to going on a meditation retreat. If that feels safe, take another step. You may be surprised to find other secret questers longing for the same conversation.
- Consider your priorities. If your steps to being more authentic at work feel unsafe or leave you feeling judged, consider how important it is to stay there. Is it time to walk away? Are you living a lie if you stay there?
- Recognize that some people will never “get it” and that’s okay. Some people might suggest that you should walk away from anyone who rejects your version of a spiritual quest, but life is far more complex than that. If a family member, for example, doesn’t understand it, then find other topics to talk about in their presence. You don’t need to lie to them, but you also don’t need to reveal your deepest heart to everyone in your life.
- Find community where you feel safe. With the internet making long distance relationships more and more accessible, it has become easier and easier to find circles where you can talk about your questions and spiritual quest. I wouldn’t say that virtual circles replace in-person relationships, but it’s at least a place to start. For example, many of the people who sign up for Lead with Your Wild Heart say that one of the best things about the program is the fact that they no longer feel alone in their quest for authenticity.
- Read a book or two that helps you understand your own quest. A few recommendations: Falling Upward: A Spirituality for the Two Halves of Life, A Hidden Wholeness: The Journey Toward an Undivided Life, The Seeker’s Guide: Making your Life a Spiritual Adventure, and What We Talk About When We Talk About God.
In all that you do, remember this – this journey is a long one. You don’t get to authentic overnight. It took me many years to realize some of the places I was living a divided life, and I know that there are still more realizations to come.
Take the journey one step at a time, and find companions along the way.
“When we simply use words in our journals, we can get stuck in left-brain thinking. We try to use logic and reason to work our way through our questions. The deeper soul questions don’t respond well to logic and reason. They need to be invited into a different space – a deeper space in the heart where intuition, creativity, and spirituality rest.”
If you’re looking for a new tool that will help you entertain the questions in your heart, perhaps Mandala Journaling is for you.