How to be a Sophia Leader

Fly boldly in the direction of your calling,

Even though it may feel more comfortable and easy to stay where you are.

Give your heart to this world,

Even though you risk having it returned to you broken.

Challenge people, inspire them, and lead them to transformation,

Even though sometimes you will fail and they will give up.

Lean deeply into Sophia’s chest and trust the wisdom that comes,

Even though resistance and doubt will try to trip you up.

Spread compassion to the broken-hearted,

Even though you alone can’t heal them and often they will remain broken.

Love lavishly and deeply,

Even though you won’t always be loved in return.

Run and dance down the path that is yours and yours alone,

Even though you’ll trip sometimes and get lost in the underbrush.

Speak loudly and clearly from the voice the Spirit breathes in you,

Even though listeners may feel uncomfortable with your truth and fear will try to silence you.

Be a joy-seeker, traveling to the ends of the earth to find it,

Even though tears will always insist on joining you on the journey.

Lose yourself occasionally in laughter and whimsy,

Even though you won’t always be taken seriously.

Be a witness for the world, pointing people toward truth & beauty,

Even though you may be taken for a fool.

See the world deeply and clearly, and be always mindful of what you see,

Even though sometimes what you see will cut you to the core.

Trust people and seek the best in them,

Even though sometimes they will fail and disappoint you.

Seek truth, seek justice, seek beauty, and seek love,

Even though some days all you will find is ugliness and hate.

Go now, boldly, and be a Sophia Leader.

The world is waiting.

Wisdom bits

I have been busy living a full and beautiful life these past days, hosting a delightful house guest from the coast, showing him how beautiful the prairies can be in winter, paying a brief visit to my brother and sister-in-law, teaching my weekly writing class, marking papers for that class, drinking a good deal of wine with previously mentioned house guest, and attending a board dinner to say a proper good-bye to the board members of the organization I left a couple of months ago. So much goodness in just a few short days.

Here are some of the random wisdom bits I’ve been reminded of these past days:

1. Feminine wisdom is not the exclusive property of women. My friend Randy has it in spades.

2. Drinking wine in the evening with a dear friend can be a good, good thing.

3. Having a husband who doesn’t get jealous when you spend two days in the company of a beloved male friend can also be a good, good thing.

4. The flattest, baldest, snow-covered prairie landscape can hold a lot of beauty when your eyes are open to it.

5. Even a short visit with special family members can remind you just how much they mean to you.

6. Someone suffering through the ravages of her second round of chemotherapy can still offer amazing gifts of hospitality and joy.

7. Shared laughter may very well be one of the greatest riches a person can find.

8. Hearing board members say, with genuine respect, that you had a significant impact and you are missed can feel very affirming.

9. When you go for a run after missing a few days, the ache, adrenalin, and meditative mind space can feel like the return of dear departed friends.

10. Visiting tourists attractions in your city when the elements have chased everyone else away can transform them with eery, peaceful beauty.

11. Sometimes the goodness of life can be defined by very simple things: a good friend or two, lots of opportunity for laughter, a healthy body, beauty in simple things, kindness, and an occasional glass of wine (or two).

In preparation

Our house in winter
I’ve spent much of the weekend preparing for the arrival of my dear friend Randy, who, like the wise men of the Christmas tale, will soon come from the East.

The house is clean (or at least reasonably so), the bed is prepared in the family room, and a little basket of goodies is waiting for his arrival. Randy is one of the best gift-givers I know, and so I delight in gathering things to honour him. Some of my long-time readers will remember Randy as the friend in Nova Scotia who gave me a beautiful spiral necklace. Because he is about to embark on a year-long contemplative study, I created a special journal for him to gather his thoughts in. I have no doubt that he will react with just the right amount of pleasure.

Though I’ve been scurrying a bit, and stressing a little too much about the house being “just right”, it is with eager anticipation that I prepare for his arrival. Soon I will leave for the airport, and for the next two days, I know that we will have many deep conversations, lots of hearty giggles, a road trip or two, and the odd glass of wine. (Randy is one of those rare humans who is as comfortable with his feminine side as his masculine, and so it is easy to be myself in his presence.)

As I look forward to his arrival, it occurs to me that all of this preparation serves as a kind of mirror reflecting the season we’re currently in. Advent. The time of waiting, anticipation, and preparation for the coming of the Christ child.

Advent is a big season. It holds so much in its weeks of waiting. It holds the hopes of nations waiting to be rescued by a new kind of leader. Slaves waiting to be released from bondage. Women waiting to be liberated from an oppressive culture. People of all stripes and colours waiting for a new paradigm, a new kingdom.

Sometimes I underestimate just how revolutionary the coming of Christ was – how it turned the world upside down. Sometimes I forget that Advent is still happening today. We are still waiting. We are still hoping. We are still being released, liberated, and set free from old bondage.

It is Sophia – the wisdom of Christ – that releases us. We are free to be who we are meant to be. We are redeemed from the old rules, the old paradigms, the old bondage. We can live fully in our bodies, dare to be bold and powerful, embrace our femininity, and BE BEAUTIFUL.

We can dance with Sophia – embrace her and move forward into new life  – because Christ came.

Just as I anticipate the arrival of Randy, who affirms me and celebrates me just the way I am, I welcome Christ, who knows me more deeply than any other, forgives my failings, and says “my child, you are beautiful.”

That is why I celebrate Advent.

Sharing the Silly

In yesterday’s post, I shared how I need to stop being so serious all the time and bring back the silly. Well, it clearly resonated with people, because lots of you rallied around and shared your silly with me. On Facebook, Twitter, and in the comments, I got silly movie and book recommendations, links to silly Youtube clips (remember Elaine’s dance on Seinfeld?) and articles in The Onion, an invitation to meet a horse guaranteed to make me smile, an invitation to go on a road trip, and a host of other ideas.

Thanks! You all made my day! I think I was grinning until the minute my head hit the pillow.

Today I have to get some work done so that I can take some time off next week to hang out with a visiting friend (who is guaranteed to make me laugh repeatedly), so I don’t have as much time to waste on social media. But none-the-less, I wanted to keep the invitation open to SHARE YOUR SILLY! (Thanks to Barbara Winter for the idea for a new name for this month of silly.)

This morning, as I brewed tea in my new elephant teapot, I decided that the elephant needs a name. And so, for today’s Share your Silly, your task is to help me NAME MY ELEPHANT!

Leave a name in the comments of this post, and if I pick yours, I’ll send you something silly in the mail. I don’t know what it is yet, but I’ll find something!

By the way, if you’re new here, and you’re wondering what all this silly stuff is doing on a site that’s dedicated to something serious like leadership, well, haven’t you heard? In the new world of Sophia leadership, silly has EVERYTHING to do with being an effective leader!

Sophia laughs! (or “Why I now drink tea out of an elephant’s trunk”)

Last night, when my husband thought it was wise to send me out of the house for some “me time”, I headed to my favourite bookstore to buy more smart books. As you can tell, I love smart books. I have bookshelves full of them, and a night stand nearly caving under the weight of them.

I had a gift certificate, so I could buy them guilt free.

I wandered through my current sections-of-choice – leadership, women’s studies, spirituality, writing, and inspiration – grabbed a handful of possibilities, and found a comfy chair to get lost in.

After flipping through a few of the books, I felt something familiar creep into my gut. A heaviness. A tight ball that was being wound even tighter by the seriousness of the books I was looking through.

“Ugh.” I thought. “I don’t want to read one more serious or smart book. I don’t want any of these.”

And in that chair, with my arms full of books, I started to weep. I wept because I suddenly realized that I no longer know how to find books that will bring me joy. I only know how to find books that will make me smarter, bring me closer to self-realization, or challenge me to serve the world with greater justice.

WHEN DID I BECOME SO DAMN SERIOUS?!?

It’s not just books. I listen to smart music too – music written by “social-justice-minded” or “plunging-the-depths-of-your-soul” folk artists.

And (I’m embarrassed to admit) when I buy jewelry, I find myself looking for some kind of spiritual meaning behind the symbols I wear, rather than just buying something for pure love.

I’ve even noticed it in my art journal. Instead of simply having fun with paint, I’m trying to inject meaning into every single page.

This is serious people. I think I have a disease. And I might very well be the last to notice it.

My dear friend Michele recently filled out a questionnaire about me (that I had requested) and she said some beautiful things that made me weep. What made me weep the most, though, was this: “While I admire your persistence and the vigour with which you approach your work, sometimes even your ‘play’ seems like work to me.”

Gulp. She’s right. I have forgotten how to play just for the fun of play.

I ask again… WHEN DID I BECOME SO DAMN SERIOUS?!

Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that this past year has been punctuated with serious things like a suicide attempt, breast reduction surgery, and the transition from employment to self-employment. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that I’ve spent the past six and a half years writing primarily about social justice issues and visiting some of the most devastatingly poor areas of the world. Perhaps it has something to do with the fact that I’ve decided to build my career on the issue of wisdom and I feel like I need to be wiser than I am to do it.

SOMETHING’S GOTTA GIVE! I have GOT to bring back my sense of play. It’s time for a shift, people. No, I’m not going to become a comedian overnight, or abandon my passion for wisdom, but I AM going to inject a little more fun into my life.

I started last night at the bookstore. I knew I couldn’t even trust myself to buy a novel (I’d probably end up with a tear-jerker set in war-torn Afghanistan), so I headed to the gift shelves, bound and determined that I would buy the silliest, most impractical, “make-me-smile” things I could find on the shelf.

And that’s why I now drink tea out of an elephant’s trunk and wear mis-matched socks on my feet. It’s time for a little FUN!

Because really, when it comes right down to it, what good is all of this wisdom if we don’t know how to laugh?

I hereby declare December the “Month of Silliness”. I am adjusting my mental image of Sophia – this month she’s got a big stupid grin on her face and she keeps bursting out in random giggles. When I put my head on her chest, I can feel the vibrations from her deep-body giggle.

PLEASE send me recommendations for books, movies, activities, WHATEVER, that are guaranteed to tickle my funny-bone and bring back my sense of ha-ha.

AND… does anyone want to knit me a tea-cozy? My elephant needs a colourful coat! 😉

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