What are we talking about when we talk about systems? (A primer on systems theory)
Recently, I created a short video about worthiness and posted it on social media. It was about how it’s hard to develop a sense of self-worth, no matter how many self-help books we read or therapy sessions we attend, if we don’t understand that we are all embedded in...
Me and the Multiverse: A Story of Regret, Deconstruction, and Liberation
Tucked into the corners of the mirror in my bedroom are two photos of me. In the black and white photo, I’m a young child, reaching across the table to dip my finger into a bowl of sugar. In the coloured photo, I’m a twenty-six-year-old, standing next to my sister,...
Go through the tunnel
There’s a pedestrian tunnel I pass through regularly, in all seasons. In summer, I often cycle through, and in winter, I pass through on foot. The tunnel provides a safe passage under a busy freeway. It’s a connecting point between my sister’s house and mine, and it’s...
Protected and Nurtured: on winter parkas and float spas (and the metaphor in between)
My friend Saleha laughs at me and shakes her head in puzzlement when I bundle up in -30° C weather and go for my daily walks. “It’s not weather that’s fit for humans,” she says, and she’s mostly right. This is the kind of weather that could kill me if I weren’t...
One Foot in Front of the Other: emotional regulation in a complicated world
photo credit: Elijah Hail, Unsplash Sometimes emotions get so mixed up and confused, don’t they? And when they get that way, and we get overwhelmed by them, we lose sight of the ways in which they take control of our behaviour and choices. Saturday was my last day...
Becoming high maintenance (or not)
photo credit: Gary Bendig, Unsplash Tenderness and fierceness. They seem to be opposites, and yet, surprisingly, they often go hand-in-hand. I first learned that lesson years ago, growing up on the farm, whenever a new mom – a cow, pig, sheep, chicken or goose – would...
Liminal Space and Liberation: On finding new wisdom in old stories
(Note: There is a free resource at the bottom of this post.) “Not only did she survive, but she kept rewriting her stories until she found enough space in them for all of the wounded to be held.” I’ve embarked on a new project recently. I’m writing a collection of...
Don’t stand in the way of beauty
I was standing on the shore as the sun set. The lake was a large blanket and the waves lapping at my feet were so small and thin they looked like someone was pulling a string under that blanket. To my right, the hombre sky faded from blue to pink. To my left, where...
On loving and letting go: the dance of attachment and non-attachment
They are all growing up and moving away from home. I've already written about my daughters leaving, but there's more - it’s become a larger theme in this moment of my life. My book is growing up and moving away too. Last Tuesday, we launched the Dutch version of the...
On being more human(e)
(photo credit: Danielle MacInnes, Unsplash) I love slow mornings. Though I usually wake fairly early (on my own body-clock, not with an alarm), I take my time getting out of bed, sometimes reaching for my journal or a book first. Once I’m finally out from under the...

Winnipeg • Manitoba • Canada
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